The author of the cover is Vlada Ivants. Автор обложки Влада Иванц.
Baby, you understand me now,
If sometimes you see that I'm mad.
© «Don't let me be misunderstood»
by Bennie Benjamin, Horace Ott & Sol Marcus
That's the end of the blue days of mine!
I've been waiting for so, so long to say these words. I'm glad that this very recent feeling of freedom allows me to put two meanings into this phrase at once: this poem book anticipates the imminent end of this creative era of mine, and my sad, drab days are really over.
Anyway, this new version of TBDOM was planned a long time ago and was supposed to include not only new songs and poems, which I wrote as if by inertia immediately after the release of the book, but also other interesting things that I didn't think of initially.
Honestly, I hate the prologue of the first version of TBDOM. If you want to know why, just remember the first question I asked you, «Do you understand me?» Well, I don't care if someone understands me or not. And if they don't understand me, then they shouldn't, if they don't want to, then they don't have to understand me or pretend to do it. I realized that I just need to let others and myself live in peace. Don't like it? Ok! Like? It's cool! Thank you if you support me. It's okay if you don’t like me.
Well, now I can say that this release should be a feast in honour of the last few months of The Blue Days Of Mine era. I have learned a lot during this time; I have become much older. The process of my growing up, my cheerful, sad, happy, good and bad days are reflected in this period. But perhaps it's time to let this part of my work end. The English language, British, American and Russian culture in this international language has greatly influenced what I create, write or do. So, if in the future some person interested in me studies my books and life, he will not be able to do it without knowledge of this period and lyrics. That is why we must celebrate the end of the blue days of mine.
So, let's raise our glasses of burgundy wine!
6 new poems and songs have been added to this chapter among the order of the old ones.
***
poem
Hello, my dear readers.
I think you're confused.
My poems are like creepers,
They're going to kill you.
It's all my poisonous sadness.
Blame it for everything.
I can be quite reckless.
I can do anything…
April 22>nd, 2024
Translation/ Перевод на русский:
***
Дорогой читатель, ты,
Должно быть, с толку сбит.
Мои поэмы, как вьюны,
Прочёл их – и убит.
Печаль моя ведь ядовита,
Во всем вини ты лишь её.
А я давно уж с толку сбита
И сделать могу… всё.
21.05.2024
Secrets
newpoem
All of the secrets that I kept
Will be with me until the end.
My dreams, my plans, my thoughts
Are untied like precarious knots.
But even if it messes up,
There's no point to just give up.
It all seems pointless, although
I will survive, just 'cause I know.
I know I'm mad because it hurts.
I know I said some simple words.
I know they'll keep blaming me.
But I will not stop being me.
March 1>st, 2025
Mental flu
poem
When the heavens are silent,
I think about what I need to do.
I guess I'm just a little tired.
It's some kind of mental flu.
The geometry is quite simple:
The parallels do not intersect.
You and I are parallel people:
We don't fight; we don't protect.
The world is wonderful, can't you see?
The clouds are white; the sky is blue.
But you're not who you used to be.
I guess, you've caught my mental flu.
April 27>th, 2024
Malady
song
[Verse 1]
There are no good lyricists left in our century
And no right medicines have been invented, ¹
There were holy people next to me while I was sick.
I wonder where I would be now if they didn't help me.
